It wasn't the first place I thought to look

It's obviously been quite a while since my last blog post. Two and a half months, actually. And I'm sad to say that in that time much of what I've been doing is serving myself. Maybe that's not right, maybe that's being a little too harsh on myself. I wish that was the case, but if I'm being honest with myself it's not. There have been many times when I was growing in my faith, reading my Bible regularly and recognizing and turning over to God parts of my life that were jacked up. That might have been 30% of the time. Then again, 30% might be generous. I've also discovered that I'm still a good actor, cause I've been able to keep the screw-ups from those closest to me. I guess today I got to a point where I realized something had to change, which has happened plenty of times before. This time I decided to do something about it.

I made and acted on a conscious decision to return to reading my Bible every day. That's something I haven't been doing, and I feel that it's a huge part of why my spiritual life has taken a huge nose dive into the ground. I was going to go to 1 John, because it's full of grace and mercy and that was what I felt like I needed. Then I grabbed my Bible and saw that the ribbon-thingy was at the beginning of James. So I read James. And while it wasn't the first place I thought to look, it turned out to be exactly what I needed; especially chapter 4. I was looking for grace; I found it in verse 6 of chapter 4: "But he (God) gives more grace. I humbled myself before God, told him I couldn't do it myself despite all my trying to.  And as always, God did something awesome!

Coffee

Coffee. I made a whole lot this weekend. I got to spend a lot of time with a really cool girl, hang out with a bunch of really cool people, and make a lot of coffee. Saturday morning I realized that all week God had been showing me the importance of patience. I had been praying about something, and I got impatient. Instead of waiting for a yes or no from God I assumed the answer would be no and decided to get annoyed, which caused me to sin. Immediately following this I discovered that the answer was in fact yes, and this opened my eyes to the importance of patience. I saw that throughout the week all the things I had gone through with kids at camp, the times I had almost flown off the handle but kept my cool, had been intended to show me how important patience was. Yet, when I asked God to reveal His will to me on a particular aspect of my life, when I should have had the patience to wait on His answer and His perfect timing, I was impatient. It showed me something. What I think is the right time usually isn't. His ways and thoughts are so much higher than my ways and thoughts. His perfect plan includes perfect timing while my flawed plan by nature is on a flawed schedule. I will be patient. I will wait for the fulfillment of His will in His PERFECT timing. And I will continue to serve Him while seeking His will and His glory every day.

Thank you Jesus. Thank you for your forgiveness, and thank you for having a plan for not only my life, but the lives of everyone. Thank you for using me to minister to your children and to show your love, mercy, and grace to those who desperately need it, both within the Body and without. I pray that you will help me to continue to do so, and that I will do so more and more effectively.Thank you for opening my eyes to my own impatience, and for showing me that if I will simply wait on your answer and your guidance you will lead me where I should go. Thank you for the salvation so freely offered to all who believe. Thank you for the love, mercy, and grace that you have shown to me so abundantly. And thank you for the people you have surrounded me with, both the believers and nonbelievers. Thank you for the encouragers and for those whom I can encourage. Give me the boldness and courage to do so, to share your love, and show me what to say and do. Act through me, make me but a vessel to pour out your love on others. You are amazing. Thank you. In your beautiful and holy name, so be it.

It's been a crazy week,

but not entirely in a bad way. To be fair some of it has been bad, and I'll hit that before the good so I can finish on a positive note. But first, I just wanna say that God is awesome. No particular reason; but that's not entirely true. There is one VERY particular reason. He sent His one and only Son to Earth to live a perfect and sinless life, knowing He would one day give up that life for the lives of the very pitiful, worthless wretches who would kill Him. And He still came, and through His death and resurrection we can have life, and have it more abundantly. And all we have to do is believe. For that reason, I say that God is awesome. And that is the understatement of not just the century, but of all eternity.

Now for the bad. I almost had to bite my tongue off to keep from cussing at a camper the other day. See, I used to have an extremely dirty mouth - I would cuss up a storm. I tried a few times to stop cussing, but I was relying on my own strength. I tried to do it without God, and I failed. Then came January and the huge wake-up call that a run in with the law often brings. I began to seek God instead of myself, and without even thinking about it those words disappeared from my vocabulary. Then came the third week of summer camp, and an 8-person soccer game at 9:30 in the morning. One kid argued with me about penalties for at least the first 30 minutes of the game, and I managed to keep my cool for most of it. But the time came when I had had enough, and as I heard the "f" start to form in my mouth I bit off the word, closed my mouth, and turned around to look at the other counselor who was playing and silently screamed. I turned around and in no uncertain terms, but at the same time without being mean or hateful, set the kid straight on our relative positions on the proverbial food chain. I even explained to him why what he was calling penalties were in fact not penalties. I really wish I hadn't lost my cool for that second, but at the same time I thank God that I didn't cuss at the kid and that I was able to regain my composure very quickly and handle the situation correctly.

Well, that was the bad; now for the good. I spent the weekend at home with my dad (all our womenfolk were away) and got to have a late Father's Day with him and celebrate Olivia's fourth birthday. It was great; honestly one thing I really miss about living at home is being able to spend time with my dad. I also picked up a french press, which means I can finally make coffee at the apartment again without having to pay a bajillion dollars for those Keurig k-cups. And it's so much better - by far the best coffee I've ever made myself. Next thing I buy is gonna be a grinder; gonna grind my own beans! Started up Bible study with Alex again this morning, and it was awesome. He brought Hardee's, I brewed coffee, and we got in the Word. I really treasure the friends I have that I can do that with, the main two being Alex and Tucker. Y'all are both an encouragement to me, and I love you both to death. I also got to go to College Connection for the second time this past Sunday, and it was great once again. Good food, good fellowship, and good people. The sense of community that I've seen within this group, and within Alliance in general in the one time that I've been so far, is super-duper neat. Got ice-cream with some of the folks after we left, and that was great too. I'm just really excited about what God will have in store for me at my new church home in the mountains.

And now I come to the last thing I want to say before I hit the sheets and get some shuteye. Knowing God's will is SO important. Without seeking His will and being able to determine what it is we might as well be shooting blind. I've sought God's will on many of the bigger decisions in my life. I sought His will on my decision to join the Navy, on where to go to college in the first place and then more recently on whether to stay here at App or go back home and do my undergrad work at Southeastern. I sought His will on where to go to church up here in Boone. Now I'm seeking His will on something else, as well as reading a book entitled Finding God's Will by Gregg Matte. I've read the introduction, back cover, and inside flap so far (just started tonight) but it seems like it will be good. One particular thing it said I really liked: The best way to find the will of God is to do the will of God. Seems like circular reasoning, but I think what it's saying is that to find God's will in particular areas of our lives we must do what we already know His will for us is: immerse ourselves in His word, come to Him in prayer often, share His love and good news with everyone we meet. Then His will in specific areas will become more evident. And that's what I'm seeking now, for His will in a specific area to become clear. Specifically, in an area pertaining to women; one in particular. I've hung out with her a total of 3 times now, twice in group settings at College Connection. She's a really cool girl, super pretty, and a ton of fun to hang out with. Most importantly, she's also a Christian, one who seems to be actively seeking after God. She actually asked me to pray for her, which is something that I have not experienced in a girl that I've been interested in before, and something that I find awesome. Anyway, I'm seeking God's will on how I should pursue this relationship; whether to pursue it as a romantic interest or to keep it as just friends, to use the colloquialism. I pray for guidance for both myself and for her on that front.

Anywho, it's about time to pack it in. Goodnight interwebs.

So, I found a church up here. Finally!

Well, I prayed about it. And I checked out a couple places, but ultimately I didn't have peace about attending any of them. Then, yesterday morning I went to Alliance. And I had peace. Last night Alex and I went to the Alliance college group meeting/hangout/free spaghetti. And I had peace. And it was awesome. God has showed me the church I need to attend up here, and I'm stoked. Honestly a little surprised; it's not a Southern Baptist church. Guess I was a little set in my ways. But hey, He is faithful, and He will ALWAYS provide.

9 yThe heart of man plans his way,

but zthe Lord establishes his steps.

- Proverbs 16:9

Have I mentioned

that I like tea? A lot. Like seriously, it's awesome. You know what else is awesome? Hammocks. Specifically mine; if you have one, I'm sorry, but mine is cooler. I chilled in it this evening for the second time since I got it on Thursday, and although it got a little cold and I had to pack it in earlier than I wanted to it was super duper awesome. I got to do something awesome while laying in my awesome hammock, which brings me to the next awesome thing: reading. I love to read. I'm a big fan of C.S. Lewis (fiction and philosophy), Shakespeare, Robert Jordan, and Sir Arthur Ignatius Conan Doyle (isn't Ignatius just an awesome name?) along with a bunch of others. I have to say though, there is one book that really stands out from the rest. It's one that I've been reading on and off since I was a wee little lad, and I still haven't read all the way through. Part of that is due to the previously sporadic approach I used to reading it, part due to rereading the parts that really stick out to me. I do, however, plan to have the entire thing finished by the end of this year. I'm talking, of course, about the Bible. The Holy, perfect living Word of the One True God, every word breathed by Him, inspired by Him, and profitable for teaching, for reproof, for correction, and for training in righteousness (2 Tim 3:16). I got to read this book throughout the day, and it was definitely awesome. I was able to read it this morning after I woke up, as well as this evening as I was chillin' like a villain in my hammock. I finished up Ecclesiastes, and tonight before I go to bed I'll be starting Proverbs. I did a little bit of reading in Zechariah 3 today too; I was listening to a sermon given a couple weeks ago at Alliance Bible Fellowship here in town. It was about the way God sees us; how we are wearing literally dung-spattered garments but because of Jesus Christ we are made clean. I'll include the passage at the end of this post along with a link to the sermon; it was exactly what I needed to hear at the time. Funny how God makes stuff happen isn't it? Maybe awesome would be a better way to describe it? Yeah, I agree. Definitely awesome. I'm gonna check out Alliance in the morning. I've heard good stuff about it, and Alex went last week and said it was great. I've been needing to find a church up here, and this may be it. I'll be praying and seeking God on this tonight and tomorrow, both before and after I go. Anyway, here is the link to the message and the passage from Zechariah. Good night, and God bless.

http://www.abfmessages.org/Podcasts/2012_05_27_093441.mp3


Then he showed me jJoshua the high priest standing before the angel of the Lord, and kSatan1 standing at his right hand to accuse him.2 And the Lord said to Satan, l“The Lord rebuke you, O Satan! The Lord who has mchosen Jerusalem rebuke you! Is not this na brand2plucked from the fire?” 3 Now jJoshua was standing before the angel, oclothed with filthy garments. 4 And the angel said to pthose who were standing before him, q“Remove the filthy garments from him.” And to him he said, “Behold, rI have taken your iniquity away from you, andsI will clothe you with pure vestments.” 5 And I said, t“Let them put a clean turban on his head.” So they put a clean turban on his head and clothed him with garments. And the angel of the Lord was standing by.

It's been too long.

It's been exactly seven days since I last posted. Considering my intention was to post AT LEAST twice a week, preferably more, I'd say I need to get back on it. And so I've decided.

It's not for lack of material to post about; I've had multiple times in the past week that I've intended to write a post. It just seems that every time I think of the blog I decide to put it off until later, and then I forget about it until some other time, usually at work when there's nothing I can do about it. I allow myself to get distracted, and that's something I simply can't do if I'm going to use this as a way to keep myself accountable as well as a method of getting my thoughts and viewpoints into the world. Because they're just that important; they deserve to be there, right?

Anywho, I almost put this post off till tomorrow, which would have meant that it most likely wouldn't get done. But I didn't, and I'm glad of that. I just finished up my first week of camp as a counselor, and I have to say it was awesome. I came into the job looking at it as nothing more than a way to pay the rent and get a little bit of extra money. That was all I was looking for, and to be honest I applied for this job because I had a connection and my buddy said I should be able to get it. Then I went to the first day of staff training and found out that I'd be working with some pretty cool people. I finished the training week pretty happy with how I figured the job would be, but still more happy with the simple fact that I had a job (I had been looking for one for a while, and had some that looked pretty promising just completely fall through. Looking at it now, all I can say is God had a plan for it and I'm excited to see how he continues to work it out.). Then the first day of camp came, and it was great. I mean, I'm seriously getting paid to play with kids all day? And in the first day I moved from 25 hours a week to 40, so more pay and more time to hang out with the other counselors and the kids. There have been a few frustrating moments, but overall I continue to thoroughly enjoy the job. Those frustrating moments also provide fodder for prayer, which is never a bad thing. I also have an awesome opportunity to be a positive influence and a witness to the kids as well as the other counselors, which is super duper fantastic. That's more fodder for prayer too, so this job in general is just food for prayer and a mission field of over a hundred people total. Awesomeness! Thank you God for both providing this job and, in hindsight, for closing the doors on the others. I prayed He would provide a job for me this summer, and he did more than that. He provided a wealth of opportunity as well. He was faithful to answer my prayer, and He gave me a large mission field. And He went beyond the best that I could imagine. As the song says, how great, how great is our God.

1 Corinthians 1:9
9 nGod is faithful, by whom you were called into the ofellowship of his Son, Jesus Christ our Lord.


Romans 8:28
28 And we know that for those who love God all things work together hfor good,1 for ithose who are called according to his purpose.

2 Corinthians 4:15
15 For cit is all for your sake, so that as dgrace extends to more and more people it may increase thanksgiving, eto the glory of God.

It's been a busy week...

It's been a pretty busy week. We started training for summer camp on Monday, and it's been pretty great. The people I'm working with are awesome, and I have a feeling it's gonna be great once camps start next week. I mean, I'll be getting paid to play games with kids all day. In fact, we were told if we didn't play with them we weren't doing our jobs correctly. Awesome, right?

In other news, one of my best friends from church back home is getting married tomorrow, and it's pretty exciting. Weird to think that she's gonna be married, but great. I'm friends with her husband-to-be as well, and I'm super happy for both of them. They're great people and they're great together. They also both love Jesus, which is awesome. I'm of the firm belief that the vast majority of the time a believer who is seeking Christ and a nonbeliever (or a believer who isn't focused on putting God first) shouldn't be in a romantic relationship of any kind. I've seen it happen in my life and in the lives of friends; the one who is seeking Christ begins to compromise on "small" things to make the other person happy, and before long they're compromising on bigger and more important things and have turned from the life they were living to one that is no longer pleasing to God. I've done it, and I know others that have as well. On the other hand, when two strong believers are dating/engaged/married and they're both putting God first and pursuing His will together, awesome things happen. I've seen this too. Marriage, when entered into correctly, is beautiful. Just like everything else, when we do it the way God intended it is infinitely better than anything we could dream up ourselves. I hope to get married someday; I pray that God has a woman for me to love, cherish, put before myself, and pursue Him with, who can love me despite my many mistakes and failings. It truly is a beautiful thing.

Congratulations Lauren and Jake!!!